Captain America's Red-Faced Nazi And 6 Other Blatant Historical Lies

I haven’t seen Captain America yet, but I have confusedly watched the trailer at least a dozen times. It leads me to believe the Nazi war machine was not a horde of Aryan avengers but a swarm of Storm Troopers led by some failed, red-faced experiment. This is not true. I know because I’ve watched at least a dozen History Channel specials on the Third Reich, and never once has the narrator mentioned this. As it seems like pertinent information, I have no choice but to concludeCaptain America is outright lying to me. Not fudging the facts, not exaggerating a bit, full-on, nose-growing untruths passed off without a second glance or mea culpa. I don’t know about you, but I can’t stand for this injustice. What’s the alternative? My children growing up in a society where the fanciful imagination of a screenwriter re-dictates history? No, this simply will not do. The American people need to know Nazis weren’t led by some Satanic warmonger one step left from Jeff Goldblum’s fly. I’d like to think the best of the population, that the average person could sift through these blows against veracity, but the truth is they won’t. Within decades, teachers will be showing this film at the expense of textbooks. Where does it stop? 

You’d think this sort of falsification would be a one off shot, but I did some research. It turns out rewriting history is relatively common. Hollywood has been distorting and perverting the past for decades. Well, here and now the lies stop. I’m on a mission from God, or at least my fifth grade Social Studies teacher. We need to weed out perjuries and replace them with facts. Here are six egregious movie lies about history, and the real story of what happened.